求一个100字左右的英文笑话或一端简单的介绍

Question

求一个100字左右的英文笑话或一端简单的介绍

要简单点的初一会读的~~~
急用``星期2上课的时候老师就要我上去说了~~~
50字-100字`越简单越好~~顺便+上中文的解释`谢谢~~
字数只要不是很多就可以了~~

Answer 1

我在阳光下，我是黑色的。

WhenI'mcold,I'mblack.

我寒冷时，我是黑色的。

WhenI'mafraid,I'mblack.

我害怕时，我是黑色的。

WhenI'msick,I'mblack.

我生病了，我是黑色的。

WhenIdie,I'mstillblack.

我死了，我仍是黑色的。

You———whitepeople,

你———白种人，

Whenyouwereborn,youwerepink.

当你出生时，你是粉红色的。

Whenyougrowup,youbecomewhite.

你长大了，变成白色的。

You'reredunderthesun.

你在阳光下，你是红色的。

You'rebluewhenyou'recold.

你寒冷时，你是青色的。

Youareyellowwhenyou'reafraid.

你害怕时，你是黄色的。

You'regreenwhenyou'resick.

你生病时，你是绿色的。

You'regraywhenyoudie.

当你死时，你是灰色的。

Andyou,callme"color"?

而你，却叫我"有色人种"？

Q: What's the difference between a monkey and a flea?

A: A monkey can have fleas, but a flea can't have monkeys.

猴子会和跳蚤有什么不同呢？你可能会直接的想到它们俩是一大一小。但除此之外呢，那就是猴子身上可以长跳蚤，而跳蚤身上却不能有猴子。这个答案很有意思吧？

He is really somebody

-- My uncle has 1000 men under him.

-- He is really somebody. What does he do?

-- A maintenance man in a cemetery.

他真是一个大人物

-- 我叔叔下面有1000个人。

-- 他真是一个大人物。干什么的？

-- 墓地守墓人

Not long after an old Chinese woman came back to China from her visit to her daughter in the States, she went to a city bank to deposit the US dollars her daughter gave her. At the bank counter, the clerk checked each note carefully to see if the money was real. It made the old lady out of patience.

At last she could not hold any more, uttering. "Trust me, Sir, and trust the money. They are real US dollars. They are directly from America."

它们是从美国直接带来的

一位中国老妇人在美国看望女儿回来不久，到一家市银行存女儿送给她的美元。在银行柜台，银行职员认真检查了每一张钞票，看是否有假。

这种做法让老妇人很不耐烦，最后实在忍耐不住说：“相信我，先生，也请你相信这些钞票。这都是真正的美元，它们是从美国直接带来的。”

Mrs. Brown: Oh, my dear, I have lost my precious little dog!

Mrs. Smith: But you must put an advertisement in the papers!

Mrs. Brown: It's no use, my little dog can't read.

我的狗不识字

布朗夫人：哦，

亲爱的，我把珍爱的小狗给丢了！

史密斯夫人：可是你该在报纸上登广告啊！

布朗夫人：没有用的，我的小狗不认识字。”

Answer 2

New Year Resolution

Hoping to excite student interest in our reading center, I asked each teacher to write a New Year's resolution on a special form and send it to me. After I posted the resolutions on the bulletin board in the reading center, one young teacher stopped by, looked at them for a few minutes, then left abruptly. Passing two teachers on their way in, she stormed, "My resolution isn't posted - and mine was one of the first ones in!" I couldn't help but overhear, and the tone of her voice sent me flying to my desk in rearch of a misplaced resolution. Looking rapidly through stacks of papers, I uncovered hers. It read, "I resolve not to let little things upset me. "

新年决心书

为了激励同学们对我们阅览中心的兴趣，我请每位老师在一张特制的表格上写一篇新年决心书交给我。我将决心书张贴在阅览中心的布告牌上之后，一位年轻老师停下来看了几分钟，便抽身走开了。她越过两位老师闯了进来，大发雷霆道：“我的决心书竟然没有贴出来－而我的是第一批交上来的。”我在旁边听到了，看她气势汹汹的样子，我吓得赶紧跑回办公室去找那份放错了地方的决心书，飞快浏览了几叠纸之后，我打开了她的那一份，上面写着：我决心不再为一些小事而烦恼。