我这篇英文的自我介绍（求职用）有没有什么语法错误？

Question

我英语不好，勉强写下这些，请指点一下是否存在什么语法错误或者有其他可以改善的地方，谢谢。

good afternoon, my name is ***, it is really a great honor to have this opportunity for a interview, i would like to answer whatever you ask, and i hope i can make a good performance today.

now let me introduce myself .I am 23years old, born in xiamen,this month i graduated from xiamen University and have receive my bachelor degree .

In the past 4 years, I spend most of my time on study ,so i acquired basic knowledge of Marketing in theory. Besides, I have attended lots of Practice ,Through these I have a deeply understanding of my major.
“所以，我自信可以胜任销售工作”——我想再加上这一句，怎么翻译比较合适呢？

Answer 1

good afternoon, my name is ***, it is a great honor that I can have the opportunity for this interview, i would like to answer whatever you ask about this job, and i hope that my work experience can be suitable for the position that you are asking for.

I am 23 years old, born in xiamen and this month i graduated from xiamen University and have received my bachelor degree .

In the past four years, I spent most of my time to study ,so i acquired basic knowledge for Marketing in theory. Besides, I have attended lots of Practice ...(what are they ),Through these working experience I have a deeply understanding of my major.(what are your major)

我是加拿大的，不怎么擅长写中国简历。 可是我个人认为，这一次interview应该是稍微正式一些，而不应该用类似performance之类的词

我认为你应该多加一些你干过的工作经验还有从中的体会，就会更完美了。

最后祝你好运

所以，我自信可以胜任销售工作: So, I believe that I can ace the sales!
谢谢！

Answer 2

第一行a 改为 an ~
第二行的a去掉~
第四行received

So i believe me can suit this job

Answer 3

1 an interview
2 i am 23 years old, and was born in...
3 have received
4 i spent
5 basic knowledge of marketing theories
6 lots of practices
7 i have got a deep understanding of ...
恕我直言，语法错误太多，句式混乱，用词不地道．．

Answer 4

good afternoon, my name is ***, it is really a great honor to have this opportunity. i would like to answer whatever you ask, and i hope i can leave you a good impression today.

now let me introduce myself .I am 23years old, born in xiamen,this month i graduated from xiamen University and have received my bachelor degree .

In the past 4 years, I spend most of my time on study ,so i have acquired the basic knowledge of Marketing. Besides, I have attended lots of Practice ,Through these I have a deep understanding of my major.