WILKES-BARRE, Pa. – A night originally designated Mr. McMahon Appreciation Night turned deadly when the WWE Chairman’s limousine burst into a fiery explosion just moments after Mr. McMahon stepped into it. Permanently uprooting the world of sports-entertainment, the Chairman has been presumed dead in Wilkes-Barre, Pa. Local authorities stated it was still too early to declare anything as fact, including exactly what caused the explosion, but described the blast as an apparent
“car bombing.” They also revealed that as of 11:30 p.m. EST, no body had been recovered from the incinerated wreckage. Firefighters were quick to assess the scene, taping off sections of the parking lot to protect the evident crime scene and safeguard scores of onlookers – mostly our fans – from potential injury. Despite the intense heat and ubiquitous clouds of black smoke, countless people spilled out of the arena to get a closer look at the chaos they had just seen happen live on the TitanTron. Moments earlier, the sold-out crowd came to a still hush as they speechlessly watched from their seats. “By the time we arrived on the scene, the entire automobile was on fire,” explained a Wilkes-Barre firefighter. “It was like an inferno, and our guys were doing whatever they could to contain it as quickly as possible. In my 27 years with the fire department, I’ve never seen anything like that.”