帮忙看一下我写的这个句子对吗？怎么改？

Question

My advice about whether you come back after you graduate in abroad is that you should work in China.
帮忙看一下我写的这个句子对吗？怎么改？
我怎么感觉怪怪的。对了如果你有更好的表达也可以附下。
改错讲理由谢谢帮助
写作文
凑字
所以应该废话些。
还有骚 包些。
拜托就按我这那啥改谢谢啊

Answer 1

你对语法掌握得不错，问题在于不会用简洁的表达。英语其实和汉语一样，绕来绕去、从句套从句的说法一般情况下是不用的。
另一个问题是，不要按汉语原句的结构来表达英语，要练习直接用英语来表达一个意思。
建议改为：
I advise you to come back after your study abroad.

Answer 2

My advice is that you should work in China after you have graduated from abroad

Answer 3

My advice on whether you come back after graduating on abroad is that you should work in China.