by William Golding
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: v) U. P; ?. g& Y4 Y/ NWhile I was still a boy, I came to the conclusion that there were three grades of thinking; and since I was later to claim thinking as my hobby, I came to an even stranger conclusion - namely, that I myself could not think at all. 2 ]$ [8 m- {9 k7 k! }+ `0 Q
还是个孩子的时候我就得出了思考分三种等级的结论。后来思考成了嗜好，我进而得出了一个更加离奇的结论，那就是：我自己根本不会思考。3 w% Z r- a0 x% A: k3 Z. b
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I must have been an unsatisfactory child for grownups to deal with. I remember how incomprehensible they appeared to me at first, but not, of course, how I appeared to them. It was the headmaster of my grammar school who first brought the subject of thinking before me - though neither in the way, nor with the result he intended. He had some statuettes in his study. They stood on a high cupboard behind his desk. One was a lady wearing nothing but a bath towel. She seemed frozen in an eternal panic lest the bath towel slip down any farther, and since she had no arms, she was in an unfortunate position to pull the towel up again. Next to her, crouched the statuette of a leopard, ready to spring down at the top drawer of a filing cabinet labeled A-AH. My innocence interpreted this as the victim's last, despairing cry. Beyond the leopard was a naked, muscular gentleman, who sat, looking down, with his chin on his fist and his elbow on his knee. He seemed utterly miserable. 7 ^9 u- P$ @; S
那个时候我一定是个很让大人头疼的小孩。我还记得那时我们在彼此眼中是如何不可理喻的。（改为:当然我已经忘记自己当初在他们眼里是什么样子了,但却记得他们一开始在我眼中就是如何不可理喻的。）第一个把思考这个问题带到我面前的是我文法学校的校长，当然这样的方式，这样的结果是他始料不及的。他的办公室里有一些小雕像，就在他书桌后面一个高高的橱柜上面。其中一位女士除了一条浴巾外一丝不挂。她好象被永远地冻结在对浴巾再往下滑的恐惧中了。而不幸的是她没有手臂，所以无法把浴巾拉上来。在她的身边蜷伏着一头美洲豹，好象随时都会往下跳到档案橱柜标着A-AH的最上层的抽屉上去, 我懵懵懂懂的把这幅场景理解成受害者最后绝望的哭泣(改为：好象随时都会往下跳到档案橱柜最上层的抽屉上去，我懵懵懂懂地把那个抽屉上标着的"A-AH"理解成为猎物临死前绝望的哀鸣/惨叫 )。 在豹子的另一边端坐着一个健硕的裸体男子，他手肘支在膝头，手握拳托着腮帮子，全然一副痛苦不堪的样子。
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Some time later, I learned about these statuettes. The headmaster had placed them where they would face delinquent children, because they symbolized to him to whole of life. The naked lady was the Venus of Milo. She was Love. She was not worried about the towel. She was just busy being beautiful. The leopard was Nature, and he was being natural. The naked, muscular gentleman was not miserable. He was Rodin's Thinker, an image of pure thought. It is easy to buy small plaster models of what you think life is like. 6 p: I) a" k# }: U5 r
过了一些时候，我对这些雕像有了一些了解,才知道把它们放在正对着犯错的孩子的位置是因为对校长来说这些雕像象征着整个生命。那位裸体的女士是米罗(改为米洛斯)的维纳丝。她象征着爱。她不是在为浴巾担心，而是忙着显示美丽。美洲豹象征着自然，它在那里显得很自然而已。那位健硕的裸体男子并不痛苦，他是洛丁的思索者，一个纯粹思索的象征。要买到表达生活在你心中的意义的小石膏像是很容易的事情。
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I had better explain that I was a frequent visitor to the headmaster's study, because of the latest thing I had done or left undone. As we now say, I was not integrated. I was, if anything, disintegrated; and I was puzzled. Grownups never made sense. Whenever I found myself in a penal position before the headmaster's desk, with the statuettes glimmering whitely above him, I would sink my head, clasp my hands behind my back, and writhe one shoe over the other. ; Q! h% s7 t. T0 y8 ^( r9 {! M: z
我想我得解释一下，我是校长办公室的常客，为我最近做过或者没做的事情。用现在的话来说我是不堪教化的。其实应该说，我是顽劣不羁，头脑迷糊的。大人们从来不讲道理。每次在校长桌前接受处罚，那些雕像在他上方白晃晃地耀眼时，我就会垂下头，在身后紧扣双手，用一只鞋去折腾另一只(改为:两只鞋不停地蹭来蹭去)。
( Q: \0 V7 N4 O# l: k* pThe headmaster would look opaquely at me through flashing spectacles. "What are we going to do with you?" 9 i7 V8 r* s$ u9 ?9 D# y
校长透过亮晶晶的眼镜片眼神暗淡地看着我，：“我们该拿你怎么办呢？”
Q- M4 E/ ], G8 lWell, what were they going to do with me? I would writhe my shoe some more and stare down at the worn rug.
/ q: [2 ~ l" a6 V7 I7 [ | w; n, k哦，他们要拿我怎么办呢？我盯着旧地毯更狠命地蹂躏我的鞋。+ k. M: Y0 b* X! l; W: N k
"Look up, boy! Can't you look up?" 2 B$ x" E/ R* f: S" [9 m4 i% _
“抬起头来，孩子！你就不能抬起头来吗？” I) w+ P5 d- O
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Then I would look at the cupboard, where the naked lady was frozen in her panic and the muscular gentleman contemplated the hindquarters of the leopard in endless gloom. I had nothing to say to the headmaster. His spectacles caught the light so that you could see nothing human behind them. There was no possibility of communication.
8 j" J8 r: `, W+ |- t" G' i然后我就会抬起头来看橱柜，看着裸体女士被冻结在恐惧中，健硕的男子无限忧郁地凝视着猎豹的后腿。我跟校长没什么好说的。他的镜片反光，所以我看不到镜片后面有什么人性的东西，所以没有交流的可能。5 G, B" }$ d3 c6 [( z- u0 T
"Don't you ever think at all?"
3 }5 }+ N1 Y1 ~' q/ N“你从来都不动脑筋思考的吗？”' |! m2 K; D" T g! j
4 I' I0 r$ ?5 |2 e" g( INo, I didn't think, wasn't thinking, couldn't think - I was simply waiting in anguish for the interview to stop.
7 v* T' i: r q) o* z不，我不思考，刚才没思考，也不会思考——我只是在痛苦地等待接见结束。9 d) ?) ~% }6 `6 g* i0 h# k
"Then you'd better learn - hadn't you?"
* m/ ?5 S* B! Y0 T“那你最好学一学 —— 你学了吗？”; Z, s$ e* K3 J) g" s( _
On one occasion the headmaster leaped to his feet, reached up and plonked Rodin's masterpiece on the desk before me.
- l/ o% ^( B, L6 |有一次，校长跳起身来伸手取下洛丁的杰作重重地放在我面前的桌上。: u& L* H M. h! ~
"That's what a man looks like when he's really thinking." ( |$ a5 S( P7 C0 a
“一个人真正在思考的时候是这个样子的。”. \% E7 C6 V! B* K. v
I surveyed the gentleman without interest or comprehension.
7 ]7 D7 p% `- s1 r4 v- x我毫无兴趣地看了看桌上的男子，什么也没弄懂。1 ]/ M7 B) {0 V8 z) u9 ~1 _7 Y
"Go back to your class."
8 S- @" b5 [5 M, M& u- O“回你班上去。”
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Clearly there was something missing in me. Nature had endowed the rest of the human race with a sixth sense and left me out. This must be so, I mused, on my way back to the class, since whether I had broken a window, or failed to remember Boyle抯 Law, or been late for school, my teachers produced me one, adult answer: "Why can't you think?"
- k3 ]+ f g4 L: [& a- l显然我是缺了点什么。大自然赋予其余的所有的人第六感觉却独独漏掉了我。一定是这样的，在回班上去的路上我想着。因为无论我是打烂了玻璃窗，不记得波义耳法则，还是上学迟到了，我的老师们都会千篇一律地得出一个答案：“你为什么不会思考呢？”
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; C3 p, z7 I1 Y& A# |As I saw the case, I had broken the window because I had tried to hit Jack Arney with a cricket ball and missed him; I could not remember Boyle's Law because I had never bothered to learn it; and I was late for school because I preferred looking over the bridge into the river. In fact, I was wicked. Were my teachers, perhaps, so good that they could not understand the depths of my depravity? Were they clear, untormented people who could direct their every action by this mysterious business of thinking? The whole thing was incomprehensible. In my earlier years, I found even the statuette of the Thinker confusing. I did not believe any of my teachers were naked, ever. Like someone born deaf, but bitterly determined to find out about sound, I watched my teachers to find out about thought.
5 k( U- T" Z; a7 ]( x. m/ N. M要我说，我打碎了玻璃窗是因为我想用板球打杰克.阿尼没打着；我记不住波义耳法则是因为我根本没想去记；迟到了是因为我更喜欢在桥上看河水。事实上，我是邪恶的。难道我的老师们是那么的善良，以致于无法理解我的堕落深度？他们是那种心地清澈，不受折磨，凭那神秘的思考指导每一个行动的人？整件事情都是让人无法理解的。更小一点的时候，我甚至觉得思索者塑像也是令人迷惑的。我才不相信我的哪位老师思考的时候是不穿衣服的。我象那些生来耳聋却决意苦苦寻求声音的人一样观察着我的老师们，想要了解思想。
参考资料：http://www.transfun.net/bbs/viewthread.php?tid=3&highlight=