What Love Means To Me
by Jim McMillen the man within
Loving you, and being loved by you,
its equal remains unknown.
Except for the loss of this pure delight,
Through the pain this loss has shown.
Feelings I am unable to suppress,
The beauty, or the pain.
Though the pain does fiercely BITE SO DEEP
its beauty does remain
This coin I hold, does have two sides,
This much is easy to see,
But what I want to express to you ,
Is what love means to me!
Love means giving , all it takes,
And taking all it gives.
For the pain is but a reminder,
Of the value of a love that lives!
This love does live so abundantly,
from my lips, to the core of my soul.
Having your love returned to me ,
Is only half way to my goal!
For the love that you once gave to me,
Is what stirred my love so deep!
Only having your love returned to me ,
could ever put this pain to sleep!
Although this pain is felt so FIERCE,
I can look at it with a smile.
For the long road it has accompanied me
HAS BEEN WORTH IT EVERY MILE
JIMMY DEAN MCMILLEN
From my collection
THE BENEFIT OF LIGHT
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I define love as the moment when you realise you would willingly give up your life for someone else. I've told my wife this many times but I'm not sure she fully believes me. It goes without saying that if she was in the middle of a road and a car was about to hit her I'd jump in the way, if she found herself in a burning building I would go in to save her without a second thought.
I'd sacrifice myself for her a million times over.
I have been extremely lucky to fall in love once, and I fully intend never to fall out. She has a powerful effect on me, some might call it a spell, but just the look on her face can make me melt - which might explain why the ratio of tea making in our house is currently 77 to 1, unfortunately in my favour.
I worry about her when she drives in bad weather, I worry when she goes to work when she is feeling awful and I worry when she has to walk the 50 yards to her car in the dark part of town.
But most of all I worry about how she thinks about herself. She won't know this until she reads it but I have a real pang in my heart when I see anyone feeling bad about themselves or lacking in self confidence - which is why I abhor bullying and all the nasty effects it has on the recipient. Back to my wife, she has the bravado of a bull fighter and the confidence of a penalty taker facing a goalkeeper with no arms but I still worry for times when she may doubt herself and I only wish I could be on her shoulder and whisper all the great things she has done and the amazing things she will accomplish in the future.
She is incredibly special and the world is a much better place with her in it.
Last year I married my girlfriend of over six years and at that moment realised
more than ever that I was now part of a great tag team, built on trust, forgiveness, understanding, unselfishness and a smile in the morning.
I am very open and humble in my thinking, I often ask myself why did she choose me? Well to be honest, the world can see she is much better looking than me BUT I like to think that I offer something in return. That being the promise that I will take care of her until the day I die (and she will outlive me, no doubt about it), I will always respect her and most importantly try and make her life richer and happier every single day.
If you're reading this and thinking 'this is nothing new', you're absolutely right! Love is phenomenal and as human beings we are lucky to find it in many guises. My simple motivation for writing this is to let other people know I appreciate everything love gives me and ultimately love gave me her.
Quite plainly for all that I am, I am nothing without her.
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Love is caring for other people, through thick and thin, but also knowing that you are loved. If you love your partner, and you do not believe they love you, that is not a full relationship. Love is caring for your partner, and being able to relate to how they feel, and knowing what to say. Love is Physical and mental attraction, and you can't have one or the other. Love is having the strength to see through disagreements, and easily knowing your partner. Love is friendship, and partnership, and you can't have one without the other. If you are not friends with your partner, then you are only physically attracted. Friendship is the part of love that goes deeper than the body. Friendship is mental. Love may also be viewed in many different ways, friendship, family, physically, infatuation, fake love, and true love. True love is the top of the chart. True love is love at its best; it is physical attraction, mental awareness of your partner, friendliness and care for your partner, understanding, truth, grace, thought, happiness, and fun. Without all of these things, then the feeling experienced is not full, and not perfect. Not love.
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People often ask me what real love means to me, so I thought it was time to give them an answer.
There's nothing better than just spending time on the beach and relaxing. I live in L.A and we have tons of beaches there, but nothing is better than getting out the city for a while. There's nothing like taking the time to connect with friends and loved ones, instead of stressing over some date that went wrong or a guy who didn't call you back.
Right now, I'm in East Hampton with my brother, his wife and their little boy. It's so amazing for me to see my brother grown up and finally the dad he always dreamt of being. It's beautiful how he's become the father we never had growing up. We learned a long time ago that part of life is forgiving the past. It is just as important as figuring out who you are and what you want from life.
You see, we grew up in a tumultuous household. We had a mother and father that were complete disconnected from the world around them. They did the best job they could with us, of course. But there were many things in their past that caused the disconnect. It's really made me see love in a different way.
People ask me to define real love all the time. This is what I tell them. Real love gives you the strength to hope when there isn't any. Real love makes you want to contribute even more and to become a better person than you are today. Real love is allowing your loved ones to be who they really are and supporting them no matter what.
The trouble is that so many relationships out there, whether they're parent/child, friend/friend or husband/wife, are so constricting. Too many people try to turn others into who they want them to be, rather than letting them be who they are. You should always allow people to be who they really are. Allow them to grow into the amazing being they're supposed to be.
Relationships should never be constricting. You should never try to change someone into who you think they should be. You should never try to fix someone. Real love has no restrictions. Real love allows you to be who you want to be. Think about every relationship in your life, friends, family and lovers. Do you listen to them completely? Do you allow them to share themselves with you 100%? Do you take the time to hear what they want to tell you.
Too many of us react too quickly when people talk, instead of taking the time to listen. The next time someone comes to talk to you, realize they have something they chose to share with you and nobody else at that moment. Allow them to express themselves with you freely.
To love freely is letting someone be who they are. If you don't like who they are, then you have a decision to make. Do you want to be with them or not? If you don't, let them be free. Stop expecting people to change for you and stop trying to crush their character.
I do this with my little girl now. I don't expect her to be anything than the amazing child she is. Whatever she wants to share with me. Whether it's a story about Ana from Frozen, or Ariel fromThe Little Mermaid, I go with whatever she offers me. We should do that in all our relationships.
Allow your partner to be. Just support, flow and guide, just as water does to a boat. If you're not doing that, you're not showing real love. You have to let the people you love flourish. Guide, nourish and care for those you love and you'll be amazed how much more powerful love can be.
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